magic on sunday: false strangers
listening to a recent episode of "on being" about modern dating, they mentioned that one of the major differences between relationships (specifically, marriages) today and those of the past, was that those of the past were often steeped in community. people lived close to relatives and family, and that had a big influence on the relationship, counter to today’s, which are often more isolated with couples living farther from home.
…but don’t worry, this isn’t a letter about relationships.
the idea of living in community really struck me, and friday night walking home, i was reminded that community is so prevalent if you look for it. it was just past midnight and as i walked by my favorite neighborhood spot, gristmill, i saw one of the owners, maria, and chris my favorite bartender.
the chairs were up, only half the lights were on, and the door was locked. i knocked and waved and maria came running over, opened the door, and gave me a big hug. i walked over and said hi to chris, making sure to give him some shit about his new haircut that had him looking like a pubescent 12 year old.
this place has come to be the place i eat when i’m alone, before a big trip, or when i have a guest in town. not because the food is amazing, which it is - but it’s because it’s like going over to a friend’s kitchen table for dinner and a good catch up.
i started thinking about all the other places in my neighborhood where these blips of community exist, and thought i’d share, because you probably have a few of them too:
the bodega man at 5th and sackett who feels like a big brother, where everyone i know in the neighborhood has a rapport with him. once when i stopped in with a guy i was seeing, he did a full on side-eye evaluation, looked at me, look at him again, and said dryly but sincerely, “he looks cool.” i didn’t know i wanted it, but his approval felt oddly comforting.
the woman who runs my local dry cleaners. we’ll often cross paths in the morning as she’s walking to open the shop and i’m heading to the gym, always exchanging a smile and a "good morning!"
the baristas at kos kafe, who despite the insanely slow service, are some of my favorite people (and place!) in the neighborhood. they get on me when i haven’t stopped by in a bit, and more often then not, they’ll have my medium americano ready by the time i reach the counter.
these are just three tiny, meaningless-if-you-don't-catch-it relationships, but i know there’s a million more of them out there, for me, for you, and they’re one of the best things about living in this city. i love that even away from the traditional settings of community, the opportunity for making one is everywhere you look.
magic on sunday: 4.30.17
nobody's fool - shakey graves
< - waxahatchee
this time - land of talk
secret xtians - unknown mortal orchestra
stag to the stable - of montreal
fan the flames - sheer mag
changeling - jouska
until sunday,
meghan
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